When words get in the way…

Sometimes I spend lots of time… reading and writing and thinking…

And sometimes that takes me further away from where I need to be…

Sometimes…

Silence is needed…

Sometimes… I need to just lay down colour and let it do what it will do…

greenpink.jpg

Cards from Path of the Soul Destiny Cards by Cheryl Lee Harnish

What use has a Lion for a rose…

Sometimes images strike my eye quite loudly…
Such as this one did yesterday…

XI Strength ~ The Wild Unknown Tarot

XI Strength ~ The Wild Unknown Tarot

I seemed to see such sadness in this creature’s eyes… this weary looking King of the Beasts…

How did that rose get into his mouth? I guess he was drawn in by its beauty and its scent…

But to pick it… and take it from where it dwells… is to kill it… and beauty and scent will soon fade and decay…

Yet he firmly clenches it between his teeth… Is he afraid to let go… afraid of what he thinks he’ll lose…

There is no colour to the rose…

The colour lies in the Sun that warms his back and there in the sign of infinity that marks his brow…

Why does he look outside of himself for beauty?

And that stem across his tongue… surely that is heavy with thorns that cause him pain…

What mastery is there in controlling self-inflicted pain…

Why carry that?

How easily to say no more…

No need to  roar…

Just drop…

False treasure to the floor…

With gentle opening of a jaw…

Don’t follow me… I’m not going where you’re going…

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Hello Hopsters! 😀

So… we’ve been asked to talk about quantum leaps in our understanding of Tarot

An interesting point to ponder…

My understanding shifts and changes on a constant basis. I consider it to be an evolving process as my mind makes feedback loops from what I read and what I see in the world around me… little nudges and tweaks dotted with the odd a-ha! moment every so often. I’ve got a few ways of thinking about Tarot that I use regularly and I wrote about them fairly recently (click here if you’re nosy 😀 )

But quantum leaps…

Well… I guess they have come when I’ve thrown myself out of my comfort zone and into something that makes me think – Oh! F**K!!! Why are you doing this?! Such as my first proper paid reading job (as in being paid cash rather than cakes or books or scarves or trinkets or flowers or  favours…) I got a phone call and the voice on the other end said – Am I right in thinking you read tarot?

Yes…

Then a conversation followed where they asked me to read at a psychic supper and I could hear myself saying yeah… no problem! while my head was screaming – Shut up you moron!!! What are you doing????

So… my first paid gig was back to back readings for 30 people, which I managed to somehow survive and I went home to  high five myself, then wonder why I’d spent the whole week before mad dashing to the toilet (Virgo digestive system… sorry TMI! 😀 )

Elemental Tarot ~ Caroline Smith

Elemental Tarot ~ Caroline Smith

I do have a bit of a habit of throwing myself in at the deep end or maybe putting my head in the tiger’s jaw… I will often say yes before I give myself time to talk myself out of it because I’m quite dangerous when I think and I can talk myself out of anything… But mostly these days, my conversation with myself goes along the lines of  – What’s the worst thing than can happen? Will you die?

Will I die?

No… (which on a side note is how I ended up doing stand up and also is why I’ll never end up skydiving… 😀 )

But I guess my first quantum leap in understanding Tarot came from within the pages of this book…

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This is the first Tarot book I ever bought… I struggled to find a book… I’d seen a couple but they made no sense as the ones that crossed my path were all geared up for RWS… and I didn’t have a RWS… no… my first deck was that Elemental Tarot (up above) and it has its own system… But I saw this book and opened it and it was filled with pages with a big blank rectangle for you to sit your own card on… It claimed to work for every deck… So I grabbed it…

Now… when this blog hop topic came up, it occurred to me that I’d never heard anybody mention this book or met anybody who had used it, so I decided to Google it ( a luxury unavailable in my embryonic tarot reading life… 😀 ) And I had to laugh out loud as I heard it hailed as…

THE WORST BOOK ON TAROT EVER WRITTEN

and blimey! even people calling for it to be burnt!!!

Honestly!! Burning books??? What sort of sacrilege is that? Especially by those who maybe a few hundred years ago would have been heading for a similar fate… chased by villagers with pitchforks…

And I read comment after comment…

And I gave thanks that I bought it in a time before reviews…

Though actually… now I think about it… I’ve never made a decision to buy or not buy based on a review as I’m bloody lazy and who has time to read all that… there’s an epidemic of them and even reviews of reviews…I digress… I often do…

But, anyway! I waded my way through this thread and I laughed louder and louder…

I could understand where all the comments were coming from and I could even understand why it had put someone off reading tarot for nearly 20 years…

But… I don’t read books in order or as instructed… So… I did start at chapter one… and my head started to fill with all the pomp and ceremony involved and I thought…. really? this is going to take an eternity… and then it said that the book had to be followed in strict order and worked through card by card… so I did what any relatively sane person would do and I skipped straight to the last chapter and skimmed backwards… because I had cards in hand and I wanted to read there and then…

And there, tucked away in the back (which I’m guessing a lot of people missed because they dumped the book by 2nd or 3rd chapter…) there was my quantum leap…

Visualise your card and make it as big as a door and step inside… (or words loosely to that effect)

Bingo! I was in! This was easy peasy… No different to all those hours spent with Alice in Wonderland… Just slip inside and have a chat!

And I’ve done that ever since…

I’ve always been cautious about following books to the very letter… ever since Mr S showed me this many years ago…

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The Secret Rituals of the Golden Dawn by R.G. Torrens

See… the thing is with following things to the letter, is that you need to already know what you’re doing…

Mr S will often laugh at these pages and tell me of those who he knew, those who he had heard brag that they’d performed this… to the VERY letter…

So… a question for our wrangler…

Morgan… What do you think? Typo? Or Crowley humour?

To exit… you may go West or head to the Esat…

Boiiinnnggg!!!

 I’M GONE!

😀

Hop now!

Arwen Lynch or Joanne Sprott will be there to catch you 😀

Or maybe you’ll land in the safety net of the mister last…

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Change of a dress…

XXI The World (c)Jordan Hoggard

XXI The World
(c)Jordan Hoggard

I’ve been feeling a lot of shifts and turns lately… not only in my writing but also in my life in general and things that are further afield…

It feels to be a time where many things have come full circle or have been taken to their furthest limits…

Which means it’s time to explore a few new things…

I’ll still be writing on here with mostly Mystereum Musings…

But that playground is starting to feel way too small now and restrictive…

So… I’ve set up a sister blog…

No Fixed Abide…

Where I’ll be writing whatever I so choose…

Live by the Words… Die by the Words…

Of late I am becoming word wearing to the point of world weary…

Ace of Swords Rx

Ace of Swords Rx

I’m tired of being misinterpreted and misconstrued and being on the receiving end of unsolicited advice…

And generally being in the midst of words being flung about with nary a care for their weight and wounding ability…

Words… the double edged sword… The power to hurt or heal…

And wisely do we really choose them… eh??? oops… see… I meant… how wisely do we really choose them… or… do we really choosing them wisely… chooosing them??? eeek…. do we really choose them wisely!!

AT LAST!!! I GOT THERE!!!

Jeez these letters are slippery…

I’m tired of trying to work out if and when and how to respond…

I am so very very tired…

I’m tired of feeling the sword of Damocles hanging over my head…

Dare I open my mouth…

How will it be (mis)taken…

They say that words are cheap…

But what about consequences…

They have the potential to be painfully expensive…

And while I ponder all of this…

Out of the blue…

I get a message from an old friend…

I saw this and I thought of you…

sealiest

Thank you old friend…

You have saved my aching brain…

As now I have a canned response…

And those that know me will know what I mean…

And will return my laugh

And those that don’t know me but think that I am mean…

Well they can read it as a wave goodbye…

🙂

The life in 30 days of my desk…

You can thank Mr S for this one and his comments and observations a month back… How can you exist in that mess…

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Well… I think I’m existing just fine… after all… I think… therefore… I am…

Incidentally… My desk at this current point in time in currently clutter free and only has the laptop on which I’m now typing sat on it…

Now… my floor on the other hand…

Well… I’m sure that there’s a carpet under there somewhere… 😉

Why DOES he keep lying to me???

Why DOES he keep lying to me??? Why? Why?? WHY???

2 of Wands (c) Jordan Hoggard 2010

2 of Wands
(c) Jordan Hoggard 2010

That’s a question that I hear more often than I care to mention…

Can you use your Tarot cards to tell me why?

Now… the thing is with Tarot cards, is that if you want the right answer… you have to ask the right question…

I learnt this lesson around 7 years ago at the hands of one of my greatest teachers…

I moved into the house I live in in 1992 and when I moved in, I was quite surprised as in the toilet there was carpet…

But the surprise soon gave way to thinking – Wow! this is the best thing ever…

The house before had no heating other than a gas fire downstairs and the bathroom was big with a bare icy cold floor… and I used to run and shudder as my feet hit and dash as quick as I could to get there and back… I’m mostly barefoot… so when I found myself with this carpeted bathroom… WOW!!! such luxury as my feet kept an ambient temperature…

Now over the years… there were 4 kids and 2 step kids in the house and 5/6 had dangly bits that well… let’s say forget taking aim… I think the game was to try and write your name… sprinkle while you tinkle was an understatement and I would start most days by being unpleasantly surprised  as I tootled into the bathroom barefoot to be rudely awoken out of my bleary eyed trudge…

And I would shudder and get on hands and knees to mop the floor… and once a week, I’d drag this great big bloody heavy carpet shampooing machine up the stairs to wash the carpet…

That carpet was wet more often than dry…

And even when one of the kids put towels down the toilet, blocked it, flushed it and flooded the place wrecking the carpet…

What did I do?

I went out and bought a new carpet…

And so the cycle continued…

Until one day when I was down on all fours scrubbing and feeling physically, emotionally and mentally drained and my then 6 year old walked in, stood next to me and asked…

What are you doing?

I turned and looked at him and my eye was level with his and I finally lost it and asked him…

WHY??? WHY??? WHY  DO YOU PEE ON MY CARPET???!!!

He looked me right in the eye and with the calm voice of maybe the greatest Zen master to ever live…

He asked me…

Why do you put carpet where I pee…

Suddenly a huge weight had been lifted…

I smiled at him…

I tossed aside the cloths…

I pulled up the carpet… rolled it… took it downstairs and tossed it into the bin…

I went out… and I bought…

Lino…

R.I.P. carpet washer…

So bloody simple…

So…

Next time you want to ask…

Why does he keep lying to me?

Maybe ask instead…

Why do I keep believing him?