Will the real Fool please stand up…

I spend many a long hour musing on humour…

I guess it’s a side effect of having been born with a gab that’s been gifted…

My sense of humour over the years has gotten me in to and out of trouble with equal ease… It’s made me friends and enemies and it’s slayed both also…

My humour is not always appropriate… though it is always there…

It’s been my most constant companion…

They say that Love has many names…

I think laughter may have more…

Laughter… it’s not always comfortable… it can take us places we didn’t expect to go… sometimes it can drop us from a great height and knock us on our ass in ways we didn’t imagine…

Sometimes… I think it’s a socially acceptable form of rutting… I see men in bars and they boom their laughter loud over one another… and the loudest gets the kudos… and I watch their bodies move and the micro expressions that flit across their faces and I wonder if really they would just love a good old fashioned punch-up… I wonder if that’s why there are few women in comedy… because deep down we know it can be a violent aggressive attack and it’s just not pretty for ladies to do that… they can go sugar their snark  with sweetness and sarcasm when it’s just girlies together… but on stage.. in public… I wonder if that frightens men… if they are scared that they are just not that funny…

Sometimes humour is a mask of protection… a shield against bullies… a deflection against facing tough choices and decisions… or a band-aid covering old wounds…

Sometimes, in our darkest hours it is the only thing that holds us together… grim humour… dark humour… the Fuck you! at death as you know the reaper draws nearer and hovers over your dearest waiting to swoop…

Sometimes… it bonds us wordlessly soul to soul to someone who we know feels a similar pain…

Sometimes… whole lifetimes of stories and connections are made with a tiny Ha!

Sometimes… It’s just good to laugh!

Ha!!! Maybe it’s the closet we get to fucking in public without getting arrested!

There are many many many faces… and at some point I guess every body gets to see them all…

I tire of trying to name them…

I don’t know if I could do it justice…

The one thing I’m fairly sure I do know is…

Facets of a FoolA sense of humour is a terrible thing to lose…

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Pull back… Pull back… Pull back…

Not that I realised at the time, but one year ago today I inadvertently created a tipping point that would force me to face many truths I didn’t want to hear…

Sometimes when you’re very close to something, it’s hard to see the exact details of just what it is that you are actually looking at…

Up close, all may seem well…

Up close, only allowed to see a tiny part of the picture…

Your view carefully manipulated by someone else’s cleverly crafted facade…

judgement blurred

Stand too close and judgement is easily blurred… blindsided by the glimmer of potential that you think you see…

Pull back…

See the bigger picture…

Pull back…

Hear the words not spoken…

Pull back…

See just how big a mess things really are…

Pull back… Pull back… Pull back…

Amazed at how far back you have to stand to see the full effed up magnitude…

Pause… Breathe… Repeat…

Now…

Pull back… Pull back… Pull back…

Keep going… all the way.., until that big picture diminishes.. fades… over the horizon… perspective taken to vanishing point…

That’s something I’ve been thinking a lot about… I’ve had some massive
lessons over the last few years.
I’ve had some quite astounding liars in my life and yes the truth does come
out, it’s never a matter of if, it’s always a matter of when…
Though I’ve come to the conclusion that yes, liars are not good and it’s
not nice to be betrayed etc…
But what has saddened me most is realising that the most damaging lies,
were the ones I told myself to pretend things weren’t happening… The
worst one of all is holding the belief that deep down all people are
inherently good and have a conscience… Couple that with a morbid
curiousity as to just how far someone will go with a lie…
Yes… Lessons learned the hard way…
Hopefully I’ll remember…
Funny thing… What really brought things into sharp focus was an emergency
dental visit for an abscess on a tooth I’ve had years of problems with and
have tried everything to save… It suddenly struck me, that if you know
that something is rotten deep down and it keeps giving you pain… Don’t
keep trying to fix it or ignore or hope it will get better… Just rip the
bugger out and let it heal cleanly…
So the tooth and truth was out!
I wear my gap as a badge of honor! And to remember to be careful as to what
I allow into my space…
I have no idea why I’m telling you all of this… Though I guess it might
amuse you in the way that tarot readers get amused by analogies…
Have a groovy one! 😀

Exploring Inner Space With Astropsychics…

When it comes to learning… I’ve had some complex engagements with education which have taken me close the to brink…

I sincerely believe that everybody should be a life long learner yet I get frequently frustrated by how knowledge is delivered… so much so that I tend to shun anything that has even the vaguest whiff of formality, in favour of trotting off in my own merry way to hunt down and round up whatever catches my eye as I check the pulse of the cosmos with my self-styled tools that in my idle hands will become Mrs Sealey’s version of a Swiss Army Knife, encompassing stethoscope, microscope, telescope, kaleidoscope and gyroscope…

Often it is the HOW of learning rather than the WHAT I’m learning that fascinates me… Occasionally the two collide and that grabs my interest threefold and moves my brain through four dimensions and beyond…

Sometimes when I decide to learn new things, it’s almost as though I can feel my thoughts move around my mind like Mercury in a maze… scattering, scrambling, rolling, reeling, breaking apart and merging again and almost impossible to bring together as a whole in the centre and sit it still… where I can examine everything at once… and work out the nature of this fleet footed spirit…

Thoughts need wrangling but what kind of harness will fit…

Sometimes I stumble across such a harness…

I’m learning Astrology and I must admit, I was a bit mmm… about signing up for classes that would be going on for a year… but I’m hooked…

I’ve spent the last few days working through exercises on Venus/Neptune…

I flip my tool kit to Babel fish…

I drop down a couple of lenses…

Psychedelic optometrist…

Shift… tweak… focus… sharper… clearer…

BINGO!!!

There it is… suddenly all is dancing, like the old lady who reads a complex crochet pattern and sees the garment rather than rows filled with glyphs of Sc in next 2 dc, ch 2, sk next 2 dc, rep from * across to last 3 dc; ch 2, skip next 2 dc, sc in last dc and in 3rd ch of turning ch-3; ch 3, turn…

Ha!!! I see in every direction all at once, forwards and backwards in time…

My Mercury Maze moves aside and makes way for images and memories and ideas yet to come all to slide and glide with ease… just like that big old screen in Minority Report…

Except… I’m not due to kill anyone…

Oh… and my screen has much better colours!

Though… the music is pretty close… 😉

 

Astro Study Buddies…

So… my pursuit to unlock the mysteries held in Astrology charts continues…

But, I am basically a touch on the lazy side and memorising new stuff never appeals to me as I know it will only fleeting fill my mind before being pushed out again to make room for yet more new stuff…

So, instead… I amuse myself with play and decide to fashion myself an Astro study deck with the help of my old friends, the Tarot Majors…

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I’m quite pleased with my results though I have to laugh that my methods of lazy play probably involve more time and effort that it would have taken to just buckle down and do some work…

But look… they’re so pretty!!!

And ooooooh….. now I can see what’s going on with those charts… 😉

I sat and pondered on how to work best with these…

And a visitor appeared…

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I heard the tiniest whisper…
Leaning in slowly, I heard the words…
Midnight
Moonlight
Mothflight
😉